Wednesday, 18 January 2017

Why I'll only date a feminist

A while ago, a white ginger man recently posted the article "Why I'll never date a feminist".

I pretty much disagree with it all of it entirely. I would like to offer a brand new article as a response to this.

Why I'll only date a feminist.

2016 saw many awful things. Brexit. Trump. Pokemon Go. Some really awful stuff. But one of the things that we saw was a breed of internet ne'er-do-wells who have fairly right-wing opinions come out of the shadows. With this, came lots of anti-feminist men who had viciously 'traditional' views  on women. These men disagree with women's rights activist on every fundamental level and want to perpetuate the idea that women should be utterly subservient to men. They are not nice people. 

Before 2016 they lurked in the internet's darkest corners on the internet on places like the "Red pill". 2016 was like a household inspector and allowed the cockroaches to come out from the woodwork of our manor house estate (that is now on fire).  These men's rights activists believe that white, straight men don't have enough privileges in society. White men are certainly the most disenfranchised group. 

Seriously, the only time when being a straight, white man is a hindrance in society is when you are a stand-up comedian. There are FAR too many of us making it WAY harder to stand out. Jeez, my life is very difficult  hard. 

But as seen from the rise of the alt-right and vocalisation the Red Pill, these trolls are incredibly present in everyday life and intend to suppress women into their dominion. For example the writer of the initial article writes: 

"People who are more loyal to their gender and not their significant other don’t make good partners. They will always look at you as inherently more fortunate than them. They’ve bought into the “battle of the sexes” mentality and it often pervades their perceptions of romance. Romance turns into a power struggle rather than a partnership."

Not a great opening line to his PlentyOfFish profile. 
There are a lot of red flags here. This man argues that women can't be both loyal to their partner and to their gender. That they can't be feminist and have a relationship with a man. Why would that be the case? All Feminism is, is caring, treating and respecting women the same as men. It's very simple and hopefully should be understood by many. But he makes it sound like it would be a warzone between a couple. The fact that he is refers to a "power struggle" suggests that he thinks of the relationship as having a higher power than the woman. This guy is essentially looking for someone who is ignorant to women's issues and wants to exploit that. He want to get his kicks from being seen as an archetypal man. I imagine there is a lot of maternal issues at work here. It's like Oedipus unblinded himself and got himself a twitter account and an article in the Newspress. 

Without dwelling on the weirdness in his article, I'd say my argument is this: why wouldn't you want to be with someone that actively is trying to promote equality? Someone who helps wants the best for their oppressed gender? Someone that wanted to help their fellow woman at little expense?
I don't necessarily mean that these women are going on marches every weekend, but their feminism lies within them. They know, love and respect everyone that reciprocates their equality. It's not much to ask for. 

It'd be easy in this blog to say straight off from the bat, the the joke "well he is unattractive - how can he be so picky?". It'd be very easy to do that. But firstly, it is isn't very nice, despite how easy it would be to do it. Seriously. There is a picture of him underneath of the writer just to illustrate how easy it would have been to ridicule him. But secondly, the issue is not his looks (despite looking like a character from Guess Who?), but it is personality and his argument to say why he wouldn't date a feminist. But the thing is, it is not just his personality. It's a growing societal attitude. Therefore, my blog is less directed to this one particular man, but towards the men's rights activists as a whole. 

How easy would it have been?!

It's clear that there is very little respect towards women in this piece. It seems deluded and self-aggrandising- and as left-wing writer, THAT IS MY JOB. Has this man actually spent any time around women? He seems to talking about the scientifically like in David Attenborough documentaries. But instead of observing them with beauty and finesse, he'll send them a message calling them a slut for not going out with him and then get annoyed when they get annoyed when they don't respond.

I think this "anti-feminist" sentiment can all be summed up fairly clearly with one regular act from men in the modern age: the sending of dick pics. You know?! When men decide to send their members to single women in a gambit to get laid. It is usually sent without the consent or requisition the female recipient. It's weird. Dick-pics are allegoric. They both are a representation of the problem and part of the problem..

I've personally never understood dick-pics, it's not in my charming nature to begin a conversation with my genitals (except from that one stand-up gig I did. I have not been asked back yet). Imagine opening a line of conversation with your genitals. You wouldn't do it at interview. You wouldn't do it at a funeral. God forbid at a christening. 

It takes a very special and confident person to send a picture. You know, the kinda fellow who has been given privileges all of their life without acknowledging it. The dick-pic sender is a man who is not afraid of rejection or living alone: they have no shame. What exactly is going through the head of the guy when they send a dick-pic. In no circumstance, will an unsolicited dick-pic end with a good solution. No person has ever receive an appendage shot and gone "Well  isn't this guy a really lovely person? He has lovely eyes and a lovely beard. This is something I want to have in/around me".

Dick-pics are offensive- y'know- because they are ultimately self-serving and blow (ha) to your own ego. They are are simple a Hail Mary attempt to have sex with someone without trying hard to impress them. What it is, is a way for men to lapse in their morals and dignity to perpetuate a fantasy which they of an egotistical nature without thinking of other people as a consequence . Dick-pics are essentially Nigel Farage. 

There is a lot of information for you, there, but here is something to take away for you. Remember this: a penis should be like playing like playing guitar: strum it as hard as you want in the privacy of your own home; but for heaven's sake please don't get it out at a party. 

Anyway, I got away on my feminist high-horse (I call her Woolf) and I digress. Here is some closing arguments for the reasons I'll only date feminists. 

Reasons to date a feminist: 

1)  You can wear one of those t-shirts which say "This is what a feminist looks like" and it would actually be true.

Maybe not as true...

2) They are aiming to match the pay gap, so your joint income account will be quite a pretty purse. You can buy each other dinner. 

3) You can watch as many episodes of RuPaul's Drag Race as you want without feeling guilty that you should be doing something else with you day. If you are dating a feminist, you can probably call it research towards the plight of the oppressed?!

4) You can shout Feminist Catcalls to one another. Practice by driving past the other person and shout outside the car window: 
"I think you are beautiful in both your body and your mind"
"I respect you, your gender and your judgement in your decisions"

" Lad culture is the pinnacle of objectification, demeaning people and the perpetuates the reckless and apathetic behaviours of the uncivilised.... (you would have driven past them at this point)".

(As a side note, you can probably understand why I'm not invited on many nights out with "the lads".)

5) Because you love them for who they are. Obviously. 

Feminist Chat-up lines:

So if you wanted to date a Feminist like me. I've written you a few feminist chat-up lines for you to use on nights out defying the patriarchy.

1) Is that a mirror in your pocket? Because I can see myself getting your consent for intercourse.

2) Are your legs tired? Because you have been running through my mind all day. Running for a highly prestigious job at well respected company.

3) Are you google? Because I've just found what I'm looking for - a strong independent woman who don't need no man. 

4) DAMN GURRL - if not obeying gendder conventions were a crime. You will be guilty as charged. Your legs are longer than the reign of the patriarchy gurl. 

5) Kissing burns 5 calories a minute. I know something physical we can to do together that burn a lot more calories.  Fancy going on a women's right march?

Hope you enjoyed! 

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